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A sample: "Even the strongest and bravest must sometimes weep. It shows they have a great heart, one that can feel compassion for others. You are brave, Matthias. Already you have done great things for one so young. I am only a simple country-bred fieldmouse, but even I can see the courage and leadership in you. A burning brand shows the way, and each day your flame grows brighter. There is none like you, Matthias. You have the sign of greatness upon you. One day Redwall and all the land will be indebted to you. Matthias, you are a true Warrior.
Matthias, your entire family is dead and your lands have been burned and salted by Northern bannerman and also I’m betraying you and I’m going to use your skin to make a bagpipe and I’m going to play rude songs about your dead father on that bagpipe and then I’m going to set you and your pregnant wife on fire, Matthias."
The Toast writes a glorious mashup of Redwall and Game of Thrones here
So the remix fics have finally been revealed for Remix _Redux 11! My story Paragons Prefer Blondes (a retelling of silentstephi's fic charming not-quite -romance Wrong Blonde) is up over at AO3. It's the first time I've participated, and it was lots of fun! The idea is that you take someone's story and retell it in a different style. I must add that silentstephi was incredibly gracious about my retelling of her story as a bad romance novel.
Title: Paragons Prefer Blondes
Fandom: Dragon Age: Origins
Pairing: Warden/Anders, Warden/Alistair, Warden/Everyone
Rating: 15, for bad sex jokes rather than actual content
Spoilers: Yes
Warnings: Bad writing, bad romance, bad sex, bad puns, and bad decisions. You have been warned.
Summary: Varric's newest romance novel isn't going down well with his editor. A rewrite of silentstephi's fic Wrong Blonde.
I don't use a pseudonym...
Title: Paragons Prefer Blondes
Fandom: Dragon Age: Origins
Pairing: Warden/Anders, Warden/Alistair, Warden/Everyone
Rating: 15, for bad sex jokes rather than actual content
Spoilers: Yes
Warnings: Bad writing, bad romance, bad sex, bad puns, and bad decisions. You have been warned.
Summary: Varric's newest romance novel isn't going down well with his editor. A rewrite of silentstephi's fic Wrong Blonde.
I don't use a pseudonym...
Title: Yoho (You Only Hang Once)
Fandom: AC4: Black Flag
Spoilers: None.
Summary: Woodes Rogers really hates pirates.
( The very words offend my ears... )
Fandom: AC4: Black Flag
Spoilers: None.
Summary: Woodes Rogers really hates pirates.
( The very words offend my ears... )
Pop over to IO9 for their great article on the 36 Greatest Supervillain Songs of All Time, with links. Lots of Disney, though Portal, Little Shop of Horrors and Dr Horrible make it in. And 'Be Prepared' from the Lion King and 'Hellfire' from The Hunchback of Notre Dame only make the list as extras. Seriously?
The satire site christwire reviews Assassin's Creed:Brotherhood under the link below. As is usual on christwire, the best parts are in the comments.
Assassin's Creed teaches children how to murder
Before everyone takes to comments to explain just how wrong the review is, it's worth noting that the whole site is an exercise in trolling right-wing Christians. As such, it's not recommended for anyone who is easily offended. Other notable game reviews include 'Soul Calibur Video Game Using Breast Mechanics to Entice Boys To Play' and 'Minecraft: The Game That Teaches Boys To Make Penis with Digital Blocks.'
Assassin's Creed teaches children how to murder
Before everyone takes to comments to explain just how wrong the review is, it's worth noting that the whole site is an exercise in trolling right-wing Christians. As such, it's not recommended for anyone who is easily offended. Other notable game reviews include 'Soul Calibur Video Game Using Breast Mechanics to Entice Boys To Play' and 'Minecraft: The Game That Teaches Boys To Make Penis with Digital Blocks.'
